Cheat Engine

[iGod]

It all started when our hyphen-happy protagonist, Radioactive Man, woke up in a lemur-infested moor. It was the tenth time it had happened. Feeling abundantly displeased, Radioactive Man attacked a potato, thinking it would make her feel better (but as usual, it did not). Heart filled with earnest fortitude, she realized that her beloved diary was missing! Immediately she called her former cellmate, Fallout Boy. Radioactive Man had known Fallout Boy for (plus or minus) 153 years, the majority of which were exotic ones. Fallout Boy was unique. He was congenial though sometimes a little... stupid. Radioactive Man called him anyway, for the situation was urgent.

Fallout Boy picked up to a very calm Radioactive Man. Fallout Boy calmly assured her that most Indonesian devil cats panic before mating, yet Indonesian devil cats usually wildly sneeze *after* mating. He had no idea what that meant; he was only concerned with distracting Radioactive Man. Why was Fallout Boy trying to distract Radioactive Man? Because he had snuck out from Radioactive Man's with the diary only six days prior. It was a enticing little diary... how could he resist?

It didn't take long before Radioactive Man got back to the subject at hand: her diary. Fallout Boy shuddered. Relunctantly, Fallout Boy invited her over, assuring her they'd find the diary. Radioactive Man grabbed her giraffe and disembarked immediately. After hanging up the phone, Fallout Boy realized that he was in trouble. He had to find a place to hide the diary and he had to do it skillfully. He figured that if Radioactive Man took the neighborhood-terrorizing crotch rocket, he had take at least five minutes before Radioactive Man would get there. But if she took the time machine? Then Fallout Boy would be ridiculously screwed.

Before he could come up with any reasonable ideas, Fallout Boy was interrupted by nine dimwitted Care Bears that were lured by his diary. Fallout Boy shuddered; 'Not again', he thought. Feeling exasperated, he randomly reached for his dull pencil and carefully slapped every last one of them. Apparently this was an adequate deterrent--the discouraged critters began to scurry back toward the magical cornfield, squealing with discontent. He exhaled with relief. That's when he heard the time machine rolling up. It was Radioactive Man.

----o0o----

As she pulled up, she felt a sense of urgency. She had had to make an unscheduled stop at Jim's House of Wings to pick up a 12-pack of live hand grenades, so she knew she was running late. With a inept leap, Radioactive Man was out of the time machine and went scandalously jaunting toward Fallout Boy's front door. Meanwhile inside, Fallout Boy was panicking. Not thinking, he tossed the diary into a box of dull pencils and then slid the box behind his giraffe. Fallout Boy was puzzled but at least the diary was concealed. The doorbell rang.

'Come in,' Fallout Boy charismatically purred. With a heroic push, Radioactive Man opened the door. 'Sorry for being late, but I was being chased by some insensitive social outcast in a tricked out go kart,' she lied. 'It's fine,' Fallout Boy assured her. Radioactive Man took a seat alarmingly close to where Fallout Boy had hidden the diary. Fallout Boy sneezed trying unsuccessfully to hide his nervousness. 'Uhh, can I get you anything?' he blurted. But Radioactive Man was distracted. A few freaknasty minutes later, Fallout Boy noticed a oafish look on Radioactive Man's face. Radioactive Man slowly opened her mouth to speak.

'...What's that smell?'

Fallout Boy felt a stabbing pain in his prostate when Radioactive Man asked this. In a moment of disbelief, he realized that he had hidden the diary right by his oscillating fan. 'Wh-what? I don't smell anything..!' A lie. A oafish look started to form on Radioactive Man's face. She turned to notice a box that seemed clearly out of place. 'Th-th-those are just my grandma's live hand grenades from when she used to have pet spotted wolf hamsters. She, uh...dropped 'em by here earlier'. Radioactive Man nodded with fake acknowledgement...then, before Fallout Boy could react, Radioactive Man randomly lunged toward the box and opened it. The diary was plainly in view.

Radioactive Man stared at Fallout Boy for what what must've been nine minutes. Like a drunken sailor at happy hour, Fallout Boy groped indiscriminately in Radioactive Man's direction, clearly desperate. Radioactive Man grabbed the diary and bolted for the door. It was locked. Fallout Boy let out a eccentric chuckle. 'If only you hadn't been so protective of that thing, none of this would have happened, Radioactive Man,' he rebuked. Fallout Boy always had been a little annoying, so Radioactive Man knew that reconciliation was not an option; she needed to escape before Fallout Boy did something crazy, like... start chucking live hand grenades at him or something. In a blinding moment of misguided bravado, she gripped her diary tightly and made a dash toward the window, diving headlong through the glass panels.

Fallout Boy looked on, blankly. 'What the hell? That seemed excessive. The other door was open, you know.' Silence from Radioactive Man. 'And to think, I varnished that window frame nine days ago...it never ends!' Suddenly he felt a tinge of concern for Radioactive Man. 'Oh. You ..okay?' Still silence. Fallout Boy walked over to the window and looked down. Radioactive Man was gone.

----o0o----

Just yonder, Radioactive Man was struggling to make her way through the lemur-infested moor behind Fallout Boy's place. Radioactive Man had severely hurt her kidney during the window incident, and was starting to lose strength. Another pack of feral Care Bears suddenly appeared, having caught wind of the diary. One by one they latched on to Radioactive Man. Already weakened from her injury, Radioactive Man yielded to the furry onslaught and collapsed. The last thing she saw before losing consciousness was a buzzing horde of Care Bears running off with her diary.

But then God came down with His outgoing smile and restored Radioactive Man's diary. Feeling pleased, God smote the Care Bears for their injustice. Then He got in His neighborhood-terrorizing crotch rocket and whizzed away with the fortitude of one million disease-carrying chipmunks running from a oversized pack of venomous koalas. Radioactive Man danced with joy when she saw this. Her diary was safe. It was a good thing, too, because in nine minutes her favorite TV show, Lizzie McGuire, was going to come on (followed immediately by 'When 3-legged wallabies meet ebola'). Radioactive Man was relieved. And so, everyone except Fallout Boy and a few contraceptive-toting long-haired sea monkeys lived blissfully happy, forever after.

http://www.the-elite.net/---/story/

[Kronos]

Cool story bro

[Solomon Grundy]

I was waiting for fresh prince